Lessons MaMaw Taught Me

When remembering pivotal moments in our lives, some are grand and earth-shaking, while others are subtle and sweet.  When I think of the latter, I remember a time in my early 20's when I ventured out with my newborn son, Adam, to see MaMaw. Verna Thomas Little, my grandmother, was one of my heroes. For over twelve years she had faithfully and tirelessly taken care of my PaPaw, slowly and painfully watching him deteriorate from Alzheimer's Disease, without so much as a complaint. Marriage vows were of the utmost importance, as “in sickness and in health” was a rock to which she clung.

MaMaw could be quite the spitfire.  She was definitely a rare bread – a woman who was confident in her calling to love her husband, children and grandchildren well, and run a household to the very best of her ability. That was enough for her. She didn’t compare herself to others. She cooked three meals a day, worked in the garden, and kept an absolutely spotless house. She took gruff from no one - it didn't matter who you were! She was kind and generous, but could also be a tad critical in a bit of a polite, Southern, passive-aggressive way.  She had her faults, for certain, and she may not have been perfect, but beyond the shadow of a doubt, she was perfectly used by God.

I arrived in the middle of her “story,” which is what she called her favorite Soap. She began our visit by telling me who was good, who was bad, and who she would “love to slap,” because they were just so “evil.”  We laughed and I asked a lot of questions, as I loved getting into her world. After her story, we talked about family, the weather, who was up to what in the family, and how Adam was growing. As always, our time together was special and genuine.

Before leaving, I first went over to PaPaw and gave him a little peck on the cheek, just like I always did.  I then went to MaMaw and gave her a kiss and a hug, topping it off with "I love you."  But her usual response of “I love you,” wasn’t retuned.  Instead, she paused, looked me in the eyes, and with great big alligator tears said, "I can always count on you to tell me 'I love you.'  I don't hear that very often anymore. I love you too, Cammie."

My heart broke.  I had never stopped to think how her life had become void of hearing my grandfather’s spunky “I love you, Verna!” each day. I had never realized how malnourished for simple affection she had become. I had failed to look beyond my own needs and venture into hers.  She was desperate for this most powerful of declarations.

That moment forever defined me. I decided never again would I withhold the words “I love you” from those God had put in my life. If I felt love for someone….anyone for that matter…the words "I love you," would flow without hesitation.  It didn’t matter who you were!  My husband, kids, sister, mother, brothers, neighbors...I would even tell the store clerk and the postal worker.  "I love you!"  That day I realized that like a dry and thirsty land, you never know who is exceedingly desperate to receive the water and nourishment these three little words impart. 

Now this has proved quite embarrassing at times, as there have been some who don't quite understand.  "What does she mean?  She seems a little over-friendly!" Well...God loves me, doesn't He?  And He tells me every day, whether it's in His Word, a song, a beautiful day, someone's smile....He NEVER holds it back.  So I'm not going to hold it back from anyone else.  Ever.

Once while leaving a message with my hairdresser, asking if she could PLEASE fit me in as soon as possible, I concluded with "I love you!"  Someone who overheard me asked, "You love your hairdresser?"  Well, as a matter of fact, yes, I do!!! She’s an amazing woman, created by God, and she’s an incredible gift to me. So like it or not, she’s going to hear it!

My challenge for all of us is this - let's not withhold these three little words. Be generous with the power of “I love you.” Tell others and mean it. But not only tell them, show them with patience, kindness, encouragement, commitment, generosity and inclusion. Let them know you are grateful that God has put them in your life.  They may be desperate to hear it. You may be the only one they hear it from.  With this in mind, what a grand opportunity we have before us – blessing others with the three most powerful words with which we have been blessed. I love you, my friends. I really do.

Much love,
Cammie